from bad to worse

'monsters in my bed, demons in my head, they won't let me sleep tonight.. they haunt me in my sleep and i cannot fight, let the thinking cease tonight..'~ insomnia

when things go from bad to worse, what else is there? i have no idea.. maybe things can get even more worse or maybe things might start to get better.. i don't know, all i know is right now i've excluded happiness from the things that i seek for myself.. i still want it, no doubt about that but that's beside the point. . right now, with all these thoughts and voices running through my head, i can only hope for a bit of silence..

intermission: Nico's Song- Chubibo

teach me how to get over you my friend
or better yet tell me how to forget you
this has to end these endless rainy days
it has to end or else..

hold me now, hold me tighter..

teach me how to mend my broken heart
show me how, how to pick up the pieces again
this has to end this endless falling of tears
it has to end or else..

hold me now, hold me tighter..
hold me now..

11-1-05

gising ako sa ilalim ng gabi,tahimik ang kadiliman,
parang normal lng, pero malakas makapeke ang paligid
maingay ang mga boses, mga boses na galing sa kawalan
mga boses na nagtatanong, pano? bakit? sino? ano?
mga boses na ako lamang ang nakakarinig
mga boses na tila hehele saking pagtulog ngayong gabi
ngunit makatulog man ako at dumating ang antok,
bukas makalawa, anjan pa rin ang mga boses,
boses na nagtatanong, pano? bakit? sino? ano?
pero tuloy at walang humpay pa ring iikot ang mundo
parang normal lang, pero malakas makapeke ang paligid..